Why is it so hard to be nice?


With the emphasis on coming to the point right away, we are all shifting our behavioral pattern to be rude. There is no time for pleasantries anymore. Cut the chase and come to the point. To illustrate our rude behavior, let me quote an instance from the workplace. My friend was angry and sad after reading a response from his boss. When I enquired about his state, he showed me the email. The email contained a few abrupt questions pointing out flaws in a plan. While reading the email, you could easily make out the boss was trigger happy. There was not much time between the receipt of the original email and the reply from the leader. The leader has apparently taken out the loaded gun and commenced shooting in all directions.

I wanted to be kind to my friend. So I asked him. Isn't this what a boss is supposed to do? They tell us what we are doing wrong. My friend heaved a deep sigh. Then he explained the background. There was a discussion with the customer which spanned several months. With bundles of patience and hours of negotiation, the client has agreed on a major decision favoring my friend's team. It might not be a complete victory, but they have turned the tide. The least the manager could do was to acknowledge this feat.

Success is not an overnight phenomenon. Several steps lead to success. If we do not encourage and recognize at least the key steps, your team will not remain motivated. How hard is it to grasp this simple fact? There is a counterpoint. Is my friend at fault as he is expecting to be thirsting for appreciation? If my friend is at fault here, I am eagerly looking for the machines to take over. Then there is no bad feeling. The leaders could really cut the chase to the finest form and forget the niceties altogether. After machines have a CPU while a human has a heart. It is time to be overtaken by the machines. Viva la revolution. 

But I really hope the revolution comes after they have agreed on universal basic income. If the specifics of universal basic income is not settled by the time of the revolution, I really hope the machines should have learned how to harness power from the human. Then I can be plugged into the Matrix and play a role. What role would I choose? Let me think. I know which one would appeal to me. I would take a role of a leader who shoots a lot of question without thinking.

Photo Courtesy: John Haslam

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